Can You Be Authentic and Be Principled? Reflections on Leadership, Spiritual Identity, and the Gift of a Friend. Part two.

My beautiful friend, Tanja Harrison, died almost two years ago. Two years. It is still hard to comprehend.

Tanja was the consummate leader. I often jokingly call myself a Pollyanna, but Tanja embodied something even more powerful: an unwavering optimism grounded in courage, wisdom, and action. She was one of the most genuinely positive people I have ever known.

Over what was probably hundreds of sushi lunches, walks, phone calls, and during her special visit to New Zealand, I learned so much from her, professionally and personally. I pretty much sought her advice on almost everything.

Looking back, Tanja was the captain of my cheering squad.

She believed in me so completely. She championed my leadership, encouraged my ideas, and saw strengths in me that I often struggled to recognise in myself. In the weeks before she passed, she sent me a text saying she was proud to call me her friend.

Imagine that.

She was proud to be my friend.

I would often confide in her about my fears of leading large group discussions, facilitating workshops, and growing my coaching practice. I would ask, “Who am I to be doing this work? What do I really have to offer?” More often than not, I would share that I felt like an imposter.

Her response was immediate and unforgettable.

“Imposter syndrome was invented to make women doubt their abilities. You deserve to be doing this work and every success that comes your way because of it. Don’t you forget that.”

Those words have stayed with me.

Her words were powerful. Her presence was unwavering. Her belief in people, especially in the people she loved, was extraordinary.

And so, knowing she is forever in my corner, I move forward with a little more confidence, a little more courage, and immense gratitude for the gift of her friendship. I miss her deeply. And I carry her with me every day.

The older I get, the more I realise that Tanja’s greatest gift to me was not simply her encouragement, but her unwavering belief in my leadership philosophy. Long before I fully articulated my work in Principled Leadership, she recognised its significance. She challenged me to trust my thinking, to continue developing the framework, and to remain steadfast in the integration of identity, values, and leadership practice.

Which brings me to a question that sits at the heart of my work:

Can you be authentic and lead within a Principled Leadership framework?

I believe the answer lies in understanding spiritual identity.

Within the Principled Leadership framework, leadership is grounded in identity: who we are beneath role, title, and external expectation, and the extent to which we are willing to lead beyond ego, into alignment with deeply held values, beliefs, and purpose.

Authenticity is not simply self-expression. It is the courage to lead from a place of truth about who we are.

Principled Leadership is not about “having principles.” It is a coherent leadership approach grounded in identity, values, and belief, and enacted consistently through behaviour, relationships, and decision-making.

When authenticity and Principled Leadership are integrated, leadership becomes coherent.

Understanding Authenticity in Leadership

Authenticity is the ongoing discipline of aligning who we are with how we lead. It is coherence, not performance.

Spiritual Identity as the Foundation of Principled Leadership

Spiritual identity is the deeper sense of self beyond role and external validation. It shapes purpose, meaning, and leadership direction.

Love is the key ingredient of a spiritual identity: To love for the good of another is a choice enacted through a spiritual lens; to choose to love enables one to be more authentic.

Leading within a Principled Leadership Framework

Authenticity and Principled Leadership are interdependent. Together, they create coherent leadership grounded in identity, values, and action. In my view, being a Principled Leader relies upon authenticity. However, being authentic does not automatically make someone a Principled Leader. Authenticity is an important starting point, but Principled Leadership requires something more: a conscious commitment to aligning identity, values, beliefs, and action in service of others.

Moving Forward

Who are we when the titles fall away? How do we lead when no one is watching? These questions continue to shape my work in Principled Leadership. How can we

It isn't over.

It's only just beginning.

Tanja’s voice remains a reminder to trust conviction, stay grounded in identity, and lead with coherence.

Tanja was an art historian and loved ceramics. She made me this beautiful dragonfly magnet and sent it through snail mail from Canada to New Zealand (of course).